Everything is Wildly Unpredictable

As the rootedness and the pure light of your Being deepens, the play changes more rapidly and things look one way and then the other.  Emotions and sensations change more dramatically.  A situation will look so clear one way and then it will completely shift, and shift again, while the ground of true happiness begins to shift from the background into the foreground.

 
The mind's idea of predictability in the external play starts to fall away and there begins to be a recognition that everything is completely, wildly, unpredictable. No matter how it looks, it can change at any moment on a dime.  You can count on none of it and yet the significance or insignificance of it is realized while the beauty and the joy that has been infusing everything all along begins to take over the screen.  The unchanging nature of pure happiness begins rooting itself more and more deeply. Opinions, attitudes, and anything that is known, are all recognized to be appearances, a thin veneer. How something looks becomes irrelevant. It is about how it is, not how it looks.

It is a wild Love that lives within you that is accessed always now.  What appears to change in time, starts changing more rapidly and more dramatically such that it becomes impossible to place an opinion upon anything.  It's all being ordained.  It's all the wisdom that allows the attention to release a habit that is all smoke and mirrors.  The source of the habit is the story of me.  You, as your mind takes yourself to be, is a mirage, and as you begin rooting more and more deeply into the nature of your Self, things in the mirage start to change more dramatically.  Shifting here and there, and there and here.

The nature of your Self is always now.  The feeling of now is the feeling of wholeness.  It's the feeling of heart, the nature of Love, so playful and unencumbered. 

The deeper you fall into the flavor of reality, the deeper and the stronger is the willingness to remain when the phase of burning away illusion presents itself and the resulting humbling occurs.  The illusion of doing is swept from your experience.  Doing and identification with what changes are reminders of forgetting.  What changes begins to change so dramatically it is impossible to hold an opinion around it.  The receiving of the experience of doing begins to be used as the reminder that it is.  

It is hard to describe because the nature of what is eternally here and now is felt, it is the only thing that is not “away from”.  It is not the always-changing show, but is what remains.  It is complete stillness yet so wildly alive, unmoving and yet connected to every single thing.  The mind’s habit is for the attention to move towards that which is changing.  You discover that there is that which is changing and that which is unchanging. Even what is called my body has constantly changing sensations, thoughts spinning around, with emotions arising out of the thoughts.  It's all constantly in flux and changing.  There is nothing unchanging in it. What is unchanging is your Beingness, which is aware of all the changes. That which is here, now, constant.  The Self.  Then the luminosity, the beauty, the aliveness can be felt and it does not come and go, it is unchanging.  The attention comes and goes but it is being worn down. That arises out of the wisdom, which arises out of the moment, and the moment arises out of the heart.  The heart is everywhere.

To student:

You know your Self so deeply.  I can feel it so clearly.  The nature of the conditioned pattern is that there are times when emotions erupt with great intensity.  The level of intensity varies from karmic pattern to karmic pattern, but you know your Self.  Your role in this life lies in not letting go of the seat that you sit in when the fire is burning. Don’t believe that experience is reality when you know it's not.

That which appears as change, changes more and more dramatically all the time.  Things look one way and then another.  They feel one way, and then another.  The oscillations get more and more intense as the rootedness in your nature, that is unbounded and untouched by any of it, deepens.  

It is all so simple and it is the greatest human challenge, because the habit lies in that which is complex not simple, convoluted not clear, separate, transient, and dying as opposed to the eternal nature of the unity of your being.  One screams for attention because it feels like there is a lack, the other is silent for it needs nothing so it typically goes unrecognized.  

It is about every single thing except what mind calls "you", and because of the conditioned habit it takes enormous humility.  Humility strips apart the illusion of being someone that was always nothing more than an amnesia.  Then you witness that every player who is playing in the dream of separation is all projection of the mind.   All there is that is something is mental projection.  What your mind calls "me", is nothing more than a mental projection.  Every player all the time, everything that is done, is your dream, your mental projection.  There is no such thing as another person who ever projects anything onto you.  It is all your own mental projection repeating itself.  

The nature of the projection is that it always changes so fast. If you stop long enough it disappears, because it is the constant change that makes it seem like something.  That's how you know it is a projection. As you are more deeply rooted into your Self, the projector speeds up, trying to continue to draw the attention but causes the recognition that you can not have an opinion on any of it.  Eventually you see that the one who holds the opinion is just a projection.  The you is just a projection and then what individual is left?  There is none.

There has never been an individual.  There is your unique Self.  The flavor of Light that is you is not a doing but a Being, is not an action.  It is pure Love and light and it is you.  There are no levels to the flavors of Light.  There are no levels or individuals in the Self.  The experience of actions are the projections of the mind, projecting itself to show it is all your mind, your dream.  There never was another one out there.  It takes enormous humility, but eventually you see that the center of the projection is the “me”.  As the illusion wears off, the ecstasy is revealed.  

When there is the inevitable return of the experience that I am someone, that I am in suffering, am less than, not getting it (which every player has), it starts becoming so clear that it is just phenomena intensifying itself.  It attempts to draw attention back into something that is realized to be purely illusion.  When there is no fear, then the taste of who you are is never lost again, no matter what the interference may look like.  It is only fear that causes the loss of connection.  The grace is that the challenges and celebrations are all under divine wisdom.  No one, once they hit a certain level of maturity, would ever change anything, no matter how it looked. What is the attempt to change?  Doing.  

There is such enormous love in being together. Because of all of the flavors, the meeting is such celebration and joy!  The myth is individual doing, past and future, “my separate life”.   Anything known is the myth.  The Light of who you are is God's celebration.   

Just imbibe the beauty. Let what appears to change, change; however it does.  It strips you of all belief.  Realize that the fundamental change is what is called me.  Let it change as it does.  The feeling of Being is constantly aware of the changes.  It is not an action, but a feeling.  It is not in a location, but location-less.  The more there is the foregoing of the old habit, the deeper the taste of this sacred relationship becomes.  

You begin to feel that the pull, the falling in love with everyone, is falling in Love with your Self.  The realization that there are no individuals is the realization that nothing is separate from anything.  It's the fingers on a hand.  

You cannot wrap around anything in the appearance of change the deeper in you go.  It shifts from having a concrete sense of everything, then you don't know how you got from here to there, to the recognition that you never moved and no one got from here to there. There begins to be frequent windows into recognizing that your Being has no past.  That the past is only a story.  That there's really no such thing. There comes a point where there is the direct realization that there is no such thing as linear time.  It is in the arena of mind, as is everything that is changing.  What changes is phenomena, phenomena is related to a character, the character is a story.  It goes round and round.  It's told over and over again.  But every time, the energetics of it come in a little more deeply. 

There is no such thing as time, there never has been.  It's an overlay.  It's a habit.  It has no inherent reality. It is driven by the play of karma.  Karma is nothing more than a computer program, virtual reality.  There has never been time.  There has to be a separate character to experience time and change.  Change is change over time.  But there is no separate character.  

The depth of humility is to let the relationship with what was believed to be me, melt away back into the ethers from where it came.  So easily spoken, yet it is so rare.  But it is the possibility.  It's why you are here, and everyone can taste it because, in truth, it is one taste.